Sunday, July 31, 2011

A good trend in clothing

Have you ever noticed lately summer wear for women depends largely on exposed and low cut bodices? That if one looked carefully or moved injudiciously all could be revealed. My friend Joanne and I spent all yesterday afternoon jerking our deep Vs right and left and north.

I know they have those undershity ( whoops ) that was a typo but how appropriate - undershirty things but they just increase your temperature and if they don't do that they help you resemble a tightly encased sausage. Yeah, they really plump when you heat 'em.

I had to go somewhere and a glimpse of cleavage was neither wanted nor welcomed. But it was very hot and I need to wear one of my summer outfits and they are my only kinda new clothes so what could I do?
See Solution below

I has recently bought several hankies on Etsy, they were random individuals sold in sets.
I needed to give the new Mrs. McCallum something borrowed, something blue, something old and something new, the hankie fit the first three! Jackpot!
But I have lots of them leftover. I gave a plain one to Owen, one to Man, to Nessa, but still I have a passel of them.

I thought, if only I could affix this here hankie right between the girls my problem would be solved. I used bobby pins to attach it either side to the war horse I use for a bra and it stayed intact all afternoon!! I felt cool, and underexposed ( read modest) but a little "unusual." I had the flat side facing up.

This afternoon we went into a great store in Lion's Head called the Lofty Lion. And lo and behold the owner Kathy was sporting the same look but with the point down and ends up like a guy would use in his tiny pocket. (Man does not like it when I called it that)
We are starting a trend. Do you want to join? On a side note I scored an amazing old table cloth $24!!!!!). See both trend and table cloth below, don't look at my hair though ok? It ain't fit. Not even for deep frying butter.

And not a crack was seen.

On your mark, get set, GO

I'm ready to run with this project now. If only I could get up out of one chair and make it to the other.....
Yesterday I got settled in with my newest rug project in my If By Water series.
I think it is pretty big, 50 by something or other but I'm using my usual #12 cut I love so well and it will go quickly as long as I stick at it.
I'm starting with the figure in the front, you can see my wool ( I'm perilously close to peach here) there on the chair arm for it, my visual aid is on the table.
I got a 1/8th of a yard hooked in and I'm liking the darkness of course because of my proclivities and my involvement in the Johnny Cash dress alike contest.

Now if I train people not to stand at the top of the stairs and yell things down to me as I hook that I can't hear and must get up and go to the stairwell to discern, I'd be very happy and much better able to have continuity.

I'm feeling a bit rough today truthfully and I'm easily annoyed in this state.
For two nights in a row (unprecedented) there have been all night noisy carrying on sessions. Well, it sure feels like all night.

Friday 2:00 am suddenly an drug and alcohol induced soccer game breaks out in the old high school field, this is not a silent game and I can see it from my house. There are many players, each with a possible career in opera if they so desired. They play for a solid two hours ranging up and down the field, the noise level waxing and waning accordingly until, finally the police arrived. The players went back inside and were quiet for a lovely hour or so until before light they decided to go home and bid each other a sportsman like good bye with much ribald and raucous banter. Note to players: get a muffler instead of car speakers bigger than my bed.

Saturday 9:00pm
I'm so tired I chose to go to bed very early, I can't keep my eyes open. I just get into bed and to sleep when a war starts up on the other side of the block. It is very common to hear few random fireworks during summer weekends. They are low powered and don't reach any great height. These alarming pyrotechnics were the industrial kinds usually set off on barges, with permits, and trained lighters well away from any dwelling or old hookers fast asleep. This was no burning schoolhouse set of backyard fireworks fun.
They went on intermittently for about 45 minutes to be capped off with arrival of several guests in mufflerless cars with even bigger stereo systems who NEED to drive around the block without ceasing. Then there was music and hilarity 'til 3 am. And then around 5 am a rolling thunder storm with much lightening topped off the sleep interruption service with gusto. I know you wish you had been here, such a good time!

And now this morning we are all cross. Kitties, me and MAN.
I hope our exhaustion and newly heightened startle factor don't create fireworks of another kind, I'm just too tired to get the water bucket out.

The moral of this story: Old hookers can't be up all night anymore and still feel good.

It will be a double nap day for sure!

Thursday, July 28, 2011

The Boyfriend's Back

Gayle this is why it is ok to have a messy studio!
Give me a cluttered studio, maybe even two

Wednesday, July 27, 2011

My prettys- Rug, room and teenagers

I got my pretty Heaven's To Betsy little wools stored in the studio and I tell you, that's a good thing. I do NOT want them running all over, partying and reproducing in the night.
Here 's a little show and tell of my studio right now. I'm loving not cleaning it up. It is so much fun to just have what I want to OUT. All is delicious stuff is available and ready to fondle and roll in if the mood strikes.
Nobody knows but me and now I guess you, but don't tell ok?
Here is my #2 If By Water all done and ready for it's last pressing. See how it is curly on the bottom? Just like my hair! I rejigged the sandy area and made it deeper as well as making my other changes previously mentioned. It was deeper to begin with but I got all smart on myself and whomp before you know it I did a dumb and took it out by 2 inches. When it was shorter it was making the viewers perspective too high. I am low down in the dark wood , peeking through the scrum of short shore junk. And it looks more like that now. I sure hope I'm not pulling a dumb right now!

"Light By Water"
#12 cut on Linen
30" x 20"

I just broke these two outta jail where they spent the last month charged with assaulting a nightgown. I paid a hefty fine but I heard from their parole officer they are gonna sew on the straight and narrow now. It's all worth it. They are 17 years old and you know, it's a tough age.

Monday, July 25, 2011

What's In A Sorting?

Today lovely bits of wool came in the mail for me. I love having little pieces and mixing them together for flesh and fields and fur and frivolity and Heavens To Betsy helps me to achieve these desires handily with their remnant bags.
I ordered three so I had 6 lbs of wool with no repeats. Truly Heaven for me!
Here they are:
They are beautiful aren't they?
It is hard to imagine exactly what is possible with them though and so I set to sorting them according to colour family. Suddenly a a world of wonder opens up!

Have you ever tried sorting your wool this way? It reveals a treasure trove and lets you see the values more easily too. Colour Play .... is there anything more fun.
Off to the washing machine I go to wash them!

Weather Update
I meant to tell you I'm wearing a wool sweater today and so happy in it.
Oh did you just say I should be dyeing for my upcoming spot dye recipe column while it's cool?
(You know it's not polite to point out others shortcomings right?)

Here is a note from Man.
When mudding the drywall added moisture in the air from wool dyeing is not required.

I guess I'm off the hook and holding it in my hand instead.

Sunday, July 24, 2011

Loving the textiles and the hooker

I tried some different 'round the house cushions on my new chairs and none really cut it like a TV designer would approve of ( you know I live for that).
BUT then I found this one:
At Winners ( AKA TJMaxx , for a good price ( I would have given them my car and house for these I'm so delighted but you can keep that to yourself)
What could be better?

Two... that's what

Here is a wonderful close up and they look great with my turkey rugs...
The thing I like about both of these amazing textiles, both rugs and cushion covers, is the unexpected colour placement. I love the surprising non-conforming ... why not put that there on this side of this symmetrical design? It is so refreshing!
Speaking of refreshing surprises, my dear friend Marge showed up, she is one of my mentors and I look up to her so much on how to be a gracious person and make people welcome and comfortable and of course how to be a lady. Margie lives in Florida all of the time now and I miss her so but I was happy for this delightful surprise!
See that glow above her head? It's a halo...

Margie I miss you!!!

Saturday, July 16, 2011

Today I finished hooking one of my rugs for my series of rugs called If By Water.
And to make it even more marvellous I was perfectly coiffed while doing so.
PERFECTLY ! despite the heat and humidity.
I have about 2 things to change in the rug, (leaf colours need more ooomph) and I'm onto actually piping it tomorrow. I'm not sure what to call it yet but is #12 cut and about 30 X 20 inches.
Ahhhh I feel happy about this and my water is laying down. Life is good!

Friday, July 15, 2011

Another Web- It's about hair

It was something like this, read ahead for full disclosure.

I'm sitting here waiting to go the bank downtown, I have to wait until the business center there comes back from lunch. It means no lineups for me and if there is one, a chair to park it on.
Well worth the bleventy bleven millions I spend to have a business account.

I thought I'd write you about another web I got caught in yesterday, I couldn't even leave the house. Brace yourselves 'cos this is about my one vain point, you know it- my hair.

I know ball caps were invented for a reason but I just can't bring myself to cover up crazy hair with an even dumber chapeau. I could go for the gusto and swan around in one of my wedding hats but I'm was just not feeling it.

Yesterday my hair did look like the wrath of some spiteful god. Too lazy fix my hair to even go out for my mother's milk, Hagen Daz ( and boy did I need it) Man took pity on my ugly head to go fetch it in. ( Will this obessesion with chocolate& peanut butter ever end?) And then I wen to bed again with out taming the beast.

Was it curly ? It looked like a curling iron that hated me was at me all night.
Was it sticking up? I think I'd welcome that.
Was it flat? yup but only on one side...
Did it have a big old starburst bed head side? OH Yah, showing off my thin spots.

By the way I need you to know that if my hair on my head grew 1/2 as fast as the hairs on my chin I'd look Crystal Gale after missing one cut.

But it doesn't so here we are.
A woman trapped in her house by her bad hair. Is that not pitiful?
To top it off my dear friend and I had a video conference this morning. I saw her first, looking like a movie star on the red carpet .... she said I can't see you.... I said there is a good reason for that...
but I let her see me anyway because she said she was my friend.
The sight of it blinded her. Struck blind.

I cannot inflict myself on a single other person this way so I got 'er done and fixed it up.
Now when I look at myself all I can hear is Mrs. Thea McCallum saying mommy you should do your hair like Paula Deen.
Heaven help me I now know it is time for an intervention. I'm getting closer everyday.

See? Sick innit?

Wednesday, July 13, 2011

Caught in a WEB of Housework


I'm taking this saying for my new motto:

My idea of housework is to sweep the room with a glance. ~Author Unknown
Rug Show continues soon!

Monday, July 11, 2011

We had a rug show and I didn't even tell ya

I know!
I was so consumed with _ _ _ ding bells in June I forgot.
Here is a great little show from my Thursday hookers at the Wiarton Public Library for the month of June! According to the librarians we lit up their lives!

Fantasy Garden with Elves- Pam Grundmann
Landscape - spun and hooked by Joanne Evans
Fishes- Linda Feilding
Running Rabbit- Pam Grundmann
Cats Paws- Pam Grundmann
Turtles - Sue Raynor
Linda Fielding - Log Cabin
Chair pads - Joanne Shilton
Robins, Crow- Barb Muldoon
Waterlilies- Beth Moore
Girl- Wanda
Pears- Wanda

MY Wee Scottie Dog by Barb Muldoon Geometric rug - me!
Original Rug - Beth Moore

What a shitty photo I took of these amazing rugs, Avedon I'm not!
Oval Rug - Free Pattern courtesy of Karen Kahle from RHM hooked by Dianne
Rectangle rug hooked by Sue Raynor

More Tomorrow!

A Two Nap Kinda Day

My Birdee likes me to take a nap every day, she is a cat so as such, a nap expert. She will cry until I join her. Today it was so hot, we took two naps, she was a happy girl.
This pre-nap photo shows how dire the need was.
Here we are after:

That cat knows what she's talking about!

Saturday, July 9, 2011

The Beach Pillow- Instructions For Sale

Have you ever wanted to hook a quick geometric but didn't like counting or measuring?
For a limited period of time, I'm offering instructions to design and hook this pillow, the instructions can be used for rugs, bordered or muted backgrounds, any cut, it is very versatile.

For only $12 you can gain the key to geometric heaven, you can relax and hook, so easy to prepare - success is your only option. Use any fabric you wish. It can be a great scrappy rug too.

Press this button to buy, downloading will begin when payment is complete, for other options please contact me.
You can also purchase this at my Etsy shop if you wish.

Friday, July 8, 2011

It Worked!! It Worked!!

Well, I got my spanking and the threat of another and despite how medieval / Taming of the Shrew it sounds it spurred me to finish 2/6th of the rug today with only 1/6th remaining.
How gratifying.

I have a habit of putting my hook in a special place when I get up to answer the phone or look for other wool. It is my fav and I dislike hooking my #12 cut without it. I spent about 15 minutes looking for it tonight and finally gave up and picked up another hook.
I didn't find my hook until I got ready to take this photo and I bent over and it fell out of my bra.
Oh, I found Jimmy Hoffa in there too and the Caramilk secret.
It must be my night.

I see by looking at the photo I got a little bit of fixing to do!

Thursday, July 7, 2011

Spank Me

Yes you read right. I need a good old fashioned spanking. It would be especially fine delivered by Elvis but I'll take what I can get. Why would a grown woman need such a thing? I'll admit a kick in my behind would work just as well.

I have hooking work to do and I won't make myself do it. Instead I clean. ( I'm truly ill my friends)
I have a place, an idea, I want to do it, I know how, I have everything I need, including time.
The only thing I'm missing is a threat.
Like a deadline or a spanking.
I think it might work.

Man feels no compunction to spank, he never spanked our children, nor me but he says he will aid me in any way I deem necessary for the advancement of my career.
Sacrifices must be made.
What a stand up guy!

If there is a photo of a hooked rug here tomorrow you will know it took!

Wednesday, July 6, 2011

To Air or Not to Air

I dream of cool air today

I think summer is upon us.
It is humid and hot here.
With all the hard work behind us and two months of free time ahead Man and I are getting down to some serious "project " time.
I have 3 rugs to hook.
I don't like it when it is hot.
But without hookers coming to the studio each week this summer do I really need to put the air conditioner in?
It seems wasteful for just me.
It is nice to have one cool room in the house to retreat to. A "safe from sweat" room.
It is nice to hook in relative comfort and didn't I hear just yesterday on CBC radio that it is best to learn and think during cooler weather during a discussion on eliminating the long summer break from school?
Cool air will tempt me more to go to the studio. ( If I have any more temptation in there it will burst at the seams)
I think what I really want is a hooking buddy down there.
Maybe I should dress my air conditioner up to look like a person....
We've already had a few dances together while I was trying to get it in by myself. It weighs as much as a person, all it needs is a face. It could both be my buddy and cool me down. A perfect confluence.

I think this debate has a clear winner, the air is going to be cooler in the studio, selfishlessly just for me.

Post card from the studio: the weather is cool, wish you were here!
Love, Wanda

Tuesday, July 5, 2011

The Dress - A novella

When my daughter told us she was getting married in a couple of months I started looking for a dress right away.
I'm not really a typical Mother of the Bride material. I dress in an eccentric way and I also knew it would be hot.
I finally found something on etsy to be made in China, sounds risky doesn't?
I had a very long dialogue with the designer and told them to go ahead. No buttons, self trim.

I was on pins and needles somewhat with rumours of a mail strike.
But went ahead and ordered hat and millinery confections from Oregon with my fingers crossed. (they arrived 5 weeks before the wedding on the same day)

Meanwhile I had other things to get ready.
I've had agoraphobia for 37 years.
I'm very lucky as I can reduce the impact of it with behaviour modification. This largely takes the form of long walks in the open every day and challenging myself each day to do somewhat difficult tasks for me... like waiting in lines, going where there are tons of people in the open.

I had been remiss in my self care and over the space of a few months this had reduced my parameters greatly.
One of the things I have the greatest difficulty with is open air things, or events where I'm confined to certain behaviours. Like a funeral, public transport or unfortunately, weddings.

I asked my daughter to make no concessions for me but to have her wedding the way she wanted. I would train up to it.
Outdoors/ 45 minutes long, this wedding was gonna be tough....I had my work cut out for me!

So every morning I walked 7 km. I pushed other frontiers.
Consequently by the time the wedding week came my dress was swimming on me.
So two days before the wedding Man and I set out to find something.
We headed east.
I tried on about 2000 outfits. My husband was a saint, Saint Man.
Finally I found a dress.
It was navy, linen, it fit.
But it was a little short. I look too stumpy with a knee length skirt.
The shop girl also wouldn't let me get it, she said it didn't fit at the small of the back.
There was way too much fabric there, it was like a giant bump.
It was cut on the bias and the designer did not take into account the way the two bias parts, top and bottom would not meet well on a straight line.

I told her I'll take care of that lump and bump problem.

I hunted the store high and low for an "lagen look" underskirt.
But there were two dresses exactly the same.
Trying to show the shop girl what I meant I folded the other dress and tucked it below the first one I had on.
There I said.... see what I mean, how much better it looks?
AHhhhh she said.

I guess there is nothing for it but that I buy both dresses.
I still wanted something to cover up if I needed it and she found me a long, light weight, knit linen sweater with double rows of adjustable ruching all the way up the back. It was a rich orange red.

I bought a slip, chopped it, down - used the waist to mid thigh, chopped the skirt off the dress, sewed them together , sewed a waist band on the slip with elastic.

BUT I still had to fix my back bump. I tried many things on my own.
NO Success
I finally call in the Big Guns, my sister in law Beth. Sometimes you just need a little help. Fitting yourself is hard, working at your back, impossible.
We tried a few things.... finally I asked her to tuck up the excess, I basted it right next to the seam and tada it worked! I sewed it for good and that was all she wrote.

Pretty scary shit to be going through at the last minute I'd say. Thank goodness I have years of being braver than mongoose attacking a cobra.

So that's the story of my dress.
Here I am with Margaret and with hat head and bad posture but you can see my hat and my double dress.

Sunday, July 3, 2011

How I spent my week-end

My weekend, my last two months, well, if you look at it that way , the last 27 years....

Here we are, the whole family just seconds before we added Owen to the bunch!
We are not tall!
But Owen is!
And so is Matt!
The gene pool must feel the need for correction!
We had a splendidly happy day filled with the required terror ( due to tremendous rainstorms and oppressive heat) wonderful people, great food and terrific music.
Remember I asked about Father /Daughter dances last week on the Mat?
Hey Hey Good Looking- Hank Williams
Alicia asked about my dress.
There is a story to tell, I'll wait until tomorrow.
I hope you can.
Have a wonderful Fourth of July.
I hope you enjoy your family to the fullest.