Monday, May 28, 2012

Being bold to bullies - Jean Schroderus

Yesterday I watched "Almost Famous".
It was a good movie.
In it I heard the mother say this quote to the lead singer:
I sat right up and took notice, this mother was a very intense woman who talked fast and smart.
"There is hope for you.
Be bold, she said, and mighty forces will come to your aid."

That message was for me!

Attributed to Goethe in the movie it was actually wrote by Basil King, who was from Charlottetown PEI  about overcoming fear. Here is the true quote:
"Go at it boldly, and you'll find unexpected forces closing round you and coming to your aid."

So I'm going to go at it boldly when I have been quiet too long.
My dear friend is being attacked in public in an uncalled for and vengeful manner because she stood up to a bully.

I want to tell you I'm shocked by my naive behaviour and acceptance in which I had the wool pulled over my eyes by the person in question. I wanted to be nice.
I understood there were problems and I was both kind and patient within my limits. But I failed to recognize the  inherent cruelty and manipulation. 

I also want to say as we have agreed to do during talks about this on the Mat so we break the chain of collusion of information, that I do not know this woman and more importantly, she does not know me. Not in the way she portrays. She does not know one thing about my life, my man, my habits or desires.
She does not know my friends, my likes, my dislikes.
She is not a reliable source of information on the subject of me or anyone for that matter.  And she talks about you I know that for sure.  And the same pattern will repeat itself through you if you stand up to her bullying.

You can ask me anything you like for veracity, I'm an open book. I really am. 
And I want to open another book for you.

I'm want my friend, Jean Schroderus, to have a chance at rebuttal. She has been portrayed in a way through cyber bullying that is not factual nor accurate.
You may have read or heard about a vile letter she wrote to someone.
At every turn the real bully has a platform but Jean is shut out of responding.

You may have had several reactions when you saw that letter, but none of them apparently questioning the veracity or integrity of the charming and deceptive letter spreader.

We want to shy away, we want to ignore or gloss over, we want to imagine we stumbled upon some sort of bitch fight. We don't like the rawness of this.

If you gave an ear or eyes to hearing or looking at this, or amended your idea of Jean because you read this letter your conscience should prick you, how do you know the letter is real? What do you know of the person who revealed this? Their motives, the circumstances? Did you ever ask what is going on even to your self.
 Or did you jump on the bandwagon, did you swallow the koolaid?

I'll assure you, you walk a narrow line because after about 3 years of very close experience, handling and  watching the person who is excerpting and reposting this letter to all and sundry who will read it I know one thing for sure - you are next on the list to be a target of this bullying. 

The fine line that will tip you onto the list is having boundaries to acceptable behaviour.

 I also want to add I'm ambivalent about this person, she is neither here nor there to me.  I'm not angry nor desiring to hurt anyone in anyway. I'm not angry with this person or any other for that matter.
No matter the circumstances one person has no right to do the things that are being done publicly to Jean. 

If you are a person who listened to and believed this letter isn't it only fair that you listen to the other side?
Here is where Jean tells her story

This is a story many of you will be sharing as yours if we do not stop giving both an ear and a platform to this slanderous behaviour.  I hope the unexpected forces are you as you find the courage to stop bullying and cruelty in our midst and offer support. If a letter is sent or a sentence spoke even if it is removed or glossed over - damage has been done as is the intent and it needs to be addressed, not ignored.

I'm not the kind to stand back or run home while somebody is being beat up and other people are getting away with it and being egged on.  I'm going to get into the fray, ask it to stop, tell, enlist the aid of others to help stop it. I do my best to tell the person being pummelled, they've got a friend in me.
I don't care what happens after that. I've acted with integrity. I acted in a way that is true to myself.

I tried ignoring for all this for 9 months like a business woman and a lady should but it has gone too far.
Nothing is more important to me than stopping this. I don't care what effect I have on my business, if I end up pushing my bolt of wool and dye pans down the street in a shopping cart with my siamese with a tin cup  -  I DON'T CARE!


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